Safety Recommendations for
Victims of Domestic Violence And Stalking

The following information has been developed to help the stalking victim in dealing with a traumatic and confusing situation. Be aware that the situation in which you are involved may never be resolved to your satisfaction or to the satisfaction of the suspect.

Remember that not all of the suggestions given here will be suitable or feasible for all situations. By no means is the information given here a complete list. Each case is to be analyzed individually, as no two relationships are the same. Not including cases where the parties have children in common, the following ideas should be thought about in each case. Talk with your local domestic violence program or law enforcement about additional safety precautions if you have children in common.

• End all communication with the person who is stalking you. You may need to write a letter stating that the person is putting you in fear, that you wish all contact to stop immediately, and that you will contact law enforcement if further contact is made. Consider having your attorney send a registered letter to this effect.

• Keep a log. Write down all details of the relationship history. Include all information you know about your stalker. Write the dates, times, and detailed summary of each incident.

• Keep track off any incidental or unusual occurrences such as hang up phone calls or acts of vandalism. Keep all letters, gifts, or other tangible pieces of evidence. Give them to the police.

• Do not try to intervene or interfere with a law enforcement investigation. Cooperate with the police and give them as much information you can.

• Do not allow family members or close friends to intervene. Persons with good intentions may cause more harm and increase your level of danger.

• Be realistic when considering a protective order. Examine both the positive and negative aspects. Make sure the limitations of the order are well understood to prevent a false sense of security. A protective order is only a piece of paper and cannot guarantee safety.

• Seek help from law enforcement, your local law enforcement, or victim witness.

• Train yourself to be more aware of your surroundings. Trust your instincts in a potentially hazardous situation and use preventative safety methods.

Safety in the home

Ask your local law enforcement to come look at your home and possibly offer more safety ideas. Here are a few…

• Remove outdoor shrubs that could provide hiding places. Install outdoor lights around your entire home, especially at entryways, balconies, patios and driveways. Make them high enough that someone cannot reach them in a standing position.

• Install motion detecting lights for areas less traveled.

• Redesign fences and gates to lock from inside your property.

• Keep all exterior gas, power and telephone boxes locked.

• Use proper deadbolt locks and keep garage doors locked at all times. Install an electric garage door opener.

• Install wide-angle mirrors, “peep-holes”, or other viewing devices in all doorways to the outside of your home. Never open a door until you identify a safe visitor.

• Post a NO SOLICITORS sign. Never accept door-to-door solicitations (sales).

• Install a lockable mailbox, or use a post office box for all your personal and business mail.

• Sliding glass doors and windows on older homes will require additional reinforcement. Talk to a locksmith.

• Place inside lights and a radio on a timer system to make it more difficult for someone to tell if you are home or not.

• Window treatments should be designed to make it easy to see out, not in. Stand outside your home at night and see if you can look inside. Ask a friend to help.

• Think about installing an alarm system. Many are now affordable through leasing programs. At a minimum, an independent monitoring company should monitor the system, have an alarm that is loud and sounds outside the home, and allow you to turn the system on from your bedroom before going to sleep.

• Maintain fire safety by installing proper smoke detectors and all-purpose fire extinguishers in you home.

For more information e-mail Hotline@vsdvalliance.org. E-mail is not a secure form of communication. To ensure confidentiality please call the Family Violence & Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.838.8238 (V/TTY).